Family
Oriana: Meagan, Drew, Jacob time for diner
Meagan: here
Drew: here
Jacob: here
Chris: now kids we're out of Milk so your gonna have vodka instead
Meagan: but I'm 14 and the twins are 7
Chris: oh right here are some silly straws
Drew: what's this Oriana; it's a new recipe Drew try it
Drew: I don't wanna
Oriana: just try it
Drew: no!
Oriana: no desert then
Drew: OK, blah!Oriana: oh come on
Drew: blah!, blah!, blah!
Oriana: put it in your napkin
Drew: BLAH!
Oriana: fine I'll take it
Chris: come now son it can't be that bad (take a bite) mmm uh uh bbbbllllllaaaaaahahhhhhh (barfing)
Oriana: oh good god
Chris: uh! that's terrible ew!
Meagan: I think I lost my appetite
Jacob: I'll try it, BBBBBBBLLLLLLAAAAHHHHH
Oriana: I think I'll try a different recipe tomorrow night
Next Day.....
Drew: Mom why were you and Dad Hammering stuff in your room
Oriana: uh um
Chris: son let me explain you see when a mommy and a Dad...
Oriana: OFF TO SCHOOL!
Meagan: but Mom the middle school is 4 miles away !
Jacob: what was Dad talking about
Oriana: get out!
At school....
Drew: Jacob look there's a talent show
Jacob: we could do that
Caleb: what are gonna do be nerds
Jacob: I don't know are you doing bad insults for your talent
Caleb: OK you got me, but I'll get you
At other school....
Chelsey: Meagan why are so late
Meagan: I had to walk
Chelsey: well anyways there's a party in on Friday want to come
Meagan: sure
Chelsey: now lets talk
Drew: how about you don't, and we move on the home
Meagan: I'm home Chris: I heard the door open you don't need to tell me
Meagan: well anyways there's a party on Friday can I go
Chris: OK but no beer until you finish your Vodka
Drew: were home
Chris: I figured, whats with the underwear
Jacob: Caleb gave us wedgies
Chris: oh did he well tomorrow I'll give a knife and you can teach him a lesson
Drew: thanks Dad
Jacob: come on Drew lets go have an adventure
Drew: yeah lets go to Mom and Dads room and look at whatever they built
Jacob: yeah
Drew: I don't see it
Jacob: maybe it's under the bed
Drew: lets check
Jacob: what's that
Drew: I don't know some short of sugar
Jacob: looks fine lets smell it
Drew: OK
Drew,andJacob: wwwhhhhhhhhoooooaaaaaa!
Meagan: here
Drew: here
Jacob: here
Chris: now kids we're out of Milk so your gonna have vodka instead
Meagan: but I'm 14 and the twins are 7
Chris: oh right here are some silly straws
Drew: what's this Oriana; it's a new recipe Drew try it
Drew: I don't wanna
Oriana: just try it
Drew: no!
Oriana: no desert then
Drew: OK, blah!Oriana: oh come on
Drew: blah!, blah!, blah!
Oriana: put it in your napkin
Drew: BLAH!
Oriana: fine I'll take it
Chris: come now son it can't be that bad (take a bite) mmm uh uh bbbbllllllaaaaaahahhhhhh (barfing)
Oriana: oh good god
Chris: uh! that's terrible ew!
Meagan: I think I lost my appetite
Jacob: I'll try it, BBBBBBBLLLLLLAAAAHHHHH
Oriana: I think I'll try a different recipe tomorrow night
Next Day.....
Drew: Mom why were you and Dad Hammering stuff in your room
Oriana: uh um
Chris: son let me explain you see when a mommy and a Dad...
Oriana: OFF TO SCHOOL!
Meagan: but Mom the middle school is 4 miles away !
Jacob: what was Dad talking about
Oriana: get out!
At school....
Drew: Jacob look there's a talent show
Jacob: we could do that
Caleb: what are gonna do be nerds
Jacob: I don't know are you doing bad insults for your talent
Caleb: OK you got me, but I'll get you
At other school....
Chelsey: Meagan why are so late
Meagan: I had to walk
Chelsey: well anyways there's a party in on Friday want to come
Meagan: sure
Chelsey: now lets talk
Drew: how about you don't, and we move on the home
Meagan: I'm home Chris: I heard the door open you don't need to tell me
Meagan: well anyways there's a party on Friday can I go
Chris: OK but no beer until you finish your Vodka
Drew: were home
Chris: I figured, whats with the underwear
Jacob: Caleb gave us wedgies
Chris: oh did he well tomorrow I'll give a knife and you can teach him a lesson
Drew: thanks Dad
Jacob: come on Drew lets go have an adventure
Drew: yeah lets go to Mom and Dads room and look at whatever they built
Jacob: yeah
Drew: I don't see it
Jacob: maybe it's under the bed
Drew: lets check
Jacob: what's that
Drew: I don't know some short of sugar
Jacob: looks fine lets smell it
Drew: OK
Drew,andJacob: wwwhhhhhhhhoooooaaaaaa!
Drew: what just happened
Jacob: I don't know
Chris: hey you guys got into my drugs get out of there, those are mine
Drew: sorry Dad
Chris: wait a minute that just sugar, huh
The Next day at school...
Jacob: hey Caleb
Caleb: what?
Drew: DDDDDDDIIIIIEEEEEE!
Jacob: AAAAHHHHHHHH!
Later
Oriana: Principal I'm here what did they do
Principal: they stabbed Caleb 57 times in the chest
Chris: you got caught! I'm very disappointed
Principal: now I was going to expel them but they paid me 20 bucks not to so I wont
Chris: good job boys
Oriana: how is that a good job
Back Home....
Chris: Meagan your vodka is getting warm
Meagan: I don't want it
Chris: fine but you're not getting any beer
Meagan: OK
Chris: don't argue with me
Meagan: I'm not
Chris: don't talk back to me missy or it'll be 1 week in the hole
Meagan: what?
Chris: 3 weeks? you want 3 weeks
Meagan: I'm not talking back
Chris: 5 weeks!
Oriana: Chris stop
Chris: I'M A WIZARD AND WILL NOT TAKE THIS FROM THE LIKES OF YOU
Drew: mom
Jacob: mom
Drew: mom
Jacob: mom Drew: mom
Jacob: mom
Oriana: WHAT! I SWEAR IF YOU SAY HI I WILL KILL YOU
Drew: bye hahahhahahahha
Chris: hahha they got you!
Jacob: anyways we have a talent show tomorrow
Oriana: what are you doing
Drew: YO MAMA!
Chris: oh dang! they got you twice!
Oriana: two bottles of wine during pregnancy and these happen
Jacob: well it's tomorrow so lets go to tomorrow
Chris: which is Thursday
Next day....
Oriana: I think Drew and Jacob are next
Chris: good this is a terrible show
Drew: hello audience
Jacob: we will be singing a song by Queen
Drew,and Jacob: AAAARRRRRREEEEEE you gonna take me home tonight? AAAAHHHHHHHH down beside that red firelight, AAAAARRRRRRREEEEE you gonna give it all you got? Fat bottom girls you make the rockin' world go round!
Oriana: oh dear god
Chris: that's my boys
Drew,andJacob: HEY! I was just a skinny lad never knew no good from bad, but I knew life before I left my Nursery, left alone with big fat fanny, she was such a naughty Nanny, HEY BIG WOMEN YOU MADE A BAD BOY OUT OF ME!
Later...
Oriana: this is your fault Chris you screwed up this Family, your daughter is now drinking vodka, the boys have done drugs killed a boy and sung Fat bottom girls
Chris: fine I'll just leave
Drew: Daddy!
Jacob: Mom is this our fault
Oriana: honey honey look at me, it's pretty much all your fault
Chris: hey there viewers we think this sketch was distasty
Drew: This sketch seemed better in my mind
Chris: so please forgive us for this sketch
Jacob: I don't know
Chris: hey you guys got into my drugs get out of there, those are mine
Drew: sorry Dad
Chris: wait a minute that just sugar, huh
The Next day at school...
Jacob: hey Caleb
Caleb: what?
Drew: DDDDDDDIIIIIEEEEEE!
Jacob: AAAAHHHHHHHH!
Later
Oriana: Principal I'm here what did they do
Principal: they stabbed Caleb 57 times in the chest
Chris: you got caught! I'm very disappointed
Principal: now I was going to expel them but they paid me 20 bucks not to so I wont
Chris: good job boys
Oriana: how is that a good job
Back Home....
Chris: Meagan your vodka is getting warm
Meagan: I don't want it
Chris: fine but you're not getting any beer
Meagan: OK
Chris: don't argue with me
Meagan: I'm not
Chris: don't talk back to me missy or it'll be 1 week in the hole
Meagan: what?
Chris: 3 weeks? you want 3 weeks
Meagan: I'm not talking back
Chris: 5 weeks!
Oriana: Chris stop
Chris: I'M A WIZARD AND WILL NOT TAKE THIS FROM THE LIKES OF YOU
Drew: mom
Jacob: mom
Drew: mom
Jacob: mom Drew: mom
Jacob: mom
Oriana: WHAT! I SWEAR IF YOU SAY HI I WILL KILL YOU
Drew: bye hahahhahahahha
Chris: hahha they got you!
Jacob: anyways we have a talent show tomorrow
Oriana: what are you doing
Drew: YO MAMA!
Chris: oh dang! they got you twice!
Oriana: two bottles of wine during pregnancy and these happen
Jacob: well it's tomorrow so lets go to tomorrow
Chris: which is Thursday
Next day....
Oriana: I think Drew and Jacob are next
Chris: good this is a terrible show
Drew: hello audience
Jacob: we will be singing a song by Queen
Drew,and Jacob: AAAARRRRRREEEEEE you gonna take me home tonight? AAAAHHHHHHHH down beside that red firelight, AAAAARRRRRRREEEEE you gonna give it all you got? Fat bottom girls you make the rockin' world go round!
Oriana: oh dear god
Chris: that's my boys
Drew,andJacob: HEY! I was just a skinny lad never knew no good from bad, but I knew life before I left my Nursery, left alone with big fat fanny, she was such a naughty Nanny, HEY BIG WOMEN YOU MADE A BAD BOY OUT OF ME!
Later...
Oriana: this is your fault Chris you screwed up this Family, your daughter is now drinking vodka, the boys have done drugs killed a boy and sung Fat bottom girls
Chris: fine I'll just leave
Drew: Daddy!
Jacob: Mom is this our fault
Oriana: honey honey look at me, it's pretty much all your fault
Chris: hey there viewers we think this sketch was distasty
Drew: This sketch seemed better in my mind
Chris: so please forgive us for this sketch